Even the Longest Journey Begins With a Single Keystroke

I sat in the dingy basement shuffling my Magic cards as I prepared to draw my first hand. Two similarly nerdy young men sat at the table with me fingering their cards as they decided which spells they would employ to destroy me.

“So, have you seen Doughy lately (Phazzle)?” my buddy Bob asked.

“No, it’s been awhile since I’ve seen Dough. How is he doing?”

“He’s not Doughy anymore.” He laughed as he laid a goblin on the table.

“No kidding?” I replied incredulously. “How’d he lose all that weight?”

“World of Warcraft,” my buddy Jimbo replied as he countered my spell. “He doesn’t eat anymore. He just plays WoW.”

I was familiar with the game. I had played a bit in college, but I had never gotten too into it. The grind to 60 seemed like it took forever and I gave up at 55. My brother played religiously. As far as I was concerned he was the best player in the world. When I went to visit him at his apartment he would go into battlegrounds and murder dozens of people for my entertainment. He was an influential member in a good guild and he apparently had really good gear. I saw him standing at the top of the mountain and decided that it was too tall for me to climb.

“Heck, that’s quite a diet. I guess as long as he’s losing weight its ok.”

“Yeah, my mom checks on him a few times a day to make sure he is still alive.” Bob laughed “Apart from working that is about all he does.”

“I just got an account yesterday.” Jimbo said. “Doughy and I are starting a guild with Bob. You should join up too.”

“Huh. We’ll see. I don’t know if I have the time though.”

That was a lie. I had all the time in the world. I had just broken up with my girlfriend a few weeks ago and I was feeling my freedom. She was an oppressive, overbearing, abusive…young lady and I was glad to be rid of her. Once when we were at Borders she caught me admiring the new edition of Dungeons & Dragons.

“If you buy that stupid book I will break up with you.” she said arms folded and foot a tappin’.

“Promise?” I replied vindictively. It was that kind of relationship.

Needless to say I was glad to be rid of her and the more I thought about it the more online gaming appealed to me. At that point in my life any activity that did not involve some vapid little shrew screaming at me about spilling a few grains of salt on her table sounded like a barrel o’ laughs.

“What are you going to call the guild?” I asked.

“I have the perfect name,” Jimbo replied “We’ll call it ‘The Army of the Howling Wind.’” As he said it he made an arch with his free hand like he was delivering the name of a soon-to-be blockbuster movie.

“Yeah, no one is going to make fun of that.” I replied with a groan.

“I flip your deck.” Bob said as he finished his combo.

…

The Army started with six players. Five of us were newbs of varying degrees. I had played the game before but I was still completely lost. I decided to play a Priest since I knew our party would need a healer. I named him Phazzle since Phizzle, my former character’s name, was taken. My buddy Jimbo played a warrior and Bob played a paladin. Doughy was a rogue.

None of us knew what we were doing. Bob’s approach to the game was different than mine. I primarily leveled by questing through zones as quickly as I could. Bob, however, did not have the attention span for questing and just preferred to go to the middle of zones and grind until the mobs turned gray. Jimbo was even worse. His warrior was decked out in a mish-mash of cloth and leather gear. He chose the gear that looked the prettiest and he didn’t care that it took him a solid two minutes to kill a mob. He liked shields so he always had one on and he wouldn’t accept constructive criticism. He was playing the game HIS way and that was all there was to it. End of story.

Needless to say I notched 80 first and immediately found that I was alone in the World of Warcraft. Jimbo and Bob were still “climbing,” and Doughy, I found, was painfully shy to the point that he had never done a single dungeon, let alone a heroic. Heroic dungeons were something that I had only heard of. I had NO idea how you got into one or what you needed to do to succeed in one. I was a healer and I didn’t even know that there was such a thing as healing addons. I just clicked and prayed.

Eventually, however, I came to learn my spec and my class. I’ll never forget my first heroic dungeon. It was Utgarde Pinnacle. I was sitting in Dalaran spamming for a “dungeon,” (this was before LFD) when a group picked me up. As I was clearing trash I thought to myself “something is different about this.” The group wasn’t dying but it was going slower and it was hard on my mana. By the time we got to Svala Sorrowgrave it hit me. “Crap. This is heroic mode.”

“Sorry guys. I didn’t know this was heroic.” I said.

“Oh, lol,” Our tank replied, “You haven’t done UP on heroic yet?”

“Ummm…no. Not UP.”

“Well, give it a try and see how it goes.” He said “If it doesn’t work out you can go.”

That fight was beyond brutal in my greens and quest blues. I remember my horror when I got stuck under the sword as it bore down on me and a DPS went down. When I was free I had just enough time to get a Divine Hymn off to prevent a wipe. It came down to me and the tank whacking at her sword and wand, but we got her down. As soon as she fell a yellow achievement bar appeared on my screen for getting my first heroic token.

“Dude, that was your FIRST heroic boss?” the tank said “That was pretty good. Now please leave ”

…

The months rolled by and Jimbo and Bob caught up. I was heroics every day, PvPing every night, and the restraining order against my ex was holding up. Life was good.

By the time we were all at level 80 I had established myself as a competent heroic healer on our server. The Army of the Howling Wind had gotten a few members and we were starting to do Raids. Doughy was the guild leader, but I ran the show, scheduled events, and kept everyone in line. I remember the pride I felt when I showed up in a PuG Naxx and someone that I had never met said “Hell yeah, Phazzle is here!”

The months rolled by. Jimbo quit because the game was too boring. He got sick of people telling him how to play. Bob was more interested in making WoW gold than raiding, which was fine with us as long as he stocked the guild bank. Doughy and I were rising raiders on the server and before long Army was competing with the top Alliance guilds for progression.

I have not lost a single pound playing WoW but I have met some of the best friends in my life because of it. Now my brother and I sit and compare gear and progression at family gatherings. No one knows what the hell we are talking about. He is still at the summit of the mountain but every tier I get a little bit closer.